Finding Freedom in Your Own Mind: The Power of Emotional Ownership “Inner peace begins the moment you choose to not allow another person or event to control your emotions.”– Pema Chödrön

There’s a quiet power in this quote—one that speaks to anyone who’s ever felt overwhelmed, manipulated, or emotionally thrown off course by another person’s words or actions. In a world that constantly demands our attention and tests our patience, inner peace can feel elusive. Yet, as Pema Chödrön so wisely reminds us, peace isn’t something we find outside ourselves. It’s something we choose, often moment by moment.

Reclaiming Your Emotional Power

It’s easy to blame others for how we feel. Someone cuts you off in traffic. A colleague takes credit for your work. A family member says something hurtful. The emotional reaction may be immediate and intense. But what if we paused—truly paused—and asked ourselves: “Do I want to give this person or situation the power to disturb my peace?”

This isn’t about becoming numb or indifferent. It’s about recognizing that you have agency. That your emotional state isn’t a puppet strung along by external events, but something you can tend to and protect.

The Choice to Respond Rather Than React

Chödrön’s words speak to the difference between reacting and responding. A reaction is often impulsive, driven by ego or fear. A response, on the other hand, is a conscious decision—one rooted in self-awareness and compassion.

When you choose not to allow another person to control your emotions, you’re not condoning their behaviour. You’re simply refusing to give away your peace.

Practical Ways to Cultivate Inner Peace

Here are a few practices that support emotional independence:

• Mindful Breathing: Before reacting, take a few deep breaths. It grounds you in the present.

• Name the Emotion: Label what you’re feeling—anger, disappointment, fear. This simple act can create distance and clarity.

• Set Boundaries: Protect your energy. You don’t have to engage with every provocation.

• Reflect, Don’t Absorb: Not every comment or opinion deserves your attention. Let others’ emotions be theirs, not yours.

• Practice Compassion: Often, people act out of their own pain. Understanding this doesn’t excuse the behaviour, but it can help you release your attachment to it.

The Empowerment of Letting Go

True empowerment doesn’t come from controlling others—it comes from mastering yourself. Choosing how you respond, protecting your inner peace, and deciding what kind of energy you allow into your life is a radical act of self-respect.

So the next time you feel that familiar rush of irritation or hurt, remember Pema Chödrön’s words. Pause. Breathe. Reclaim your peace. Because no one else can do it for you, and no one else has the right to take it from you.